Trusting God on the Detours

"O Lord, you are my God;
I will exalt you and praise your name,
for in perfect faithfulness
you have done marvelous things,
things planned long ago." Isaiah 25:1

My husband and I have never been accused of being spontaneous. We are planners. Every aspect of our life is on the calendar or thought out ahead of time. However, we know there is a fine balance between planning, being prudent and yet allowing God to lead you in His will--in His direction.

This month, I had a couple of unexpected turns in my plans or calendar. From past experience, I know it is wise to trust God when He has plans that differ from mine. This doesn't make it easy to completely let go, but it gives me hope and encouragement when I am on a strange path of life. God's plans are faithful, good and loving. Though it isn't always comfortable going in an unplanned direction, I love it when plans are only in God's control and I can just let Him lead.

I used to love Robert Frost's poem The Road Not Taken. It was so full of melancholy, strength and vivid analogy, that I was drawn in the first time I read that poem on my mother's classroom wall. As I have grown in my walk with God, I have realized the difference between a Christian and the narrator of that poem. There is no wistful looking back on choices if God is leading. When I try to guide myself, I definitely might make wrong turns, regret decisions I made or wonder what life would have offered if I had taken such-and-such a path . . . However, whether a road is well trodden or unfamiliar, if God is leading, I am going in the right direction. What comfort and peace there is in God being the Master of your life!

Thank you, Lord, for giving me direction and caring for me each and every moment of my day!

"Many, O Lord my God,
are the wonders you have done.
The things you planned for us
no one can recount to you;
were I to speak and tell of them,
they would be too many to declare."
Psalm 40:5

God Provides

This week, God has generously poured His provision on myself and my family. I feel like every turn I take, I hear good news, answered prayer and encouragement. There have been a couple of bumps in the road (for example, I saw the elusive rat in my garage, and it is about 5 pounds--HUGE!), but God has been faithful through everything and I have felt His hand through the yucky and the good. This was such a blessing to me this week, as Ryan is in the midst of his ten day business trip to Italy. I am having such a good time rejoicing with those who rejoice and feeling the prayers and care of my family and church body.

Facebook has been SUCH a blessing! I have gotten so many nice posts on my wall to tell me people didn't forget I'm alone and I'm being covered in prayer. Friend after friend has invited me to dinner or lunch, and Carter and I don't even have time to dwell on the sadness of missing Ryan.

My parents and in-laws have endured rain at Disneyland and nights of babysitting Carter to allow me to continue a fun week with little breaks in my schedule. They always are willing to help in this way, and I am so grateful for having them in my life.

God provided Ryan with a Christian mentor at his small training in Italy this week. At a time he felt alone, the new mentor came alongside and was able to encourage Ryan in his walk in a business setting.

My sister-in-law was able to hear God's answer to prayer concerning our church's Family Flick Night venue. His answer was amazing and just in His timing! We are so thankful!

There are a million examples of answered prayer this week, but I won't bore you with all of the details.

All I wanted to post was God is Good! He has poured His love upon me in so many ways I don't deserve, and I am thankful!

In Their Shoes

On Friday of last week, I took Carter to Disneyland in the morning. Since we went first thing, we made our way toward the carpool lane of the freeway to avoid the rush hour traffic. As we were sitting in the left lane, waiting for an opening in the carpool lane, a car went around me and the man used his pumping hand and specific finger to let me know I had displeased him in some way. I still have no idea what I did wrong--too slow?, did I cut him off and not realize it?, did he not approve of my Compass BIBLE Church sticker?, or any other myriad of "mistakes."

God totally was with me, and I didn't react in anger or horror. My little two year old probably didn't even notice this man's "sign language", but he does watch my reaction to drivers and my words. I was able to even, in that moment, feel sad over the man's anger and bitterness. What kind of a morning had he had to make him feel that filled with rage? Not a great one, I imagine. I was able to pray for him and genuinely hope he knew, or could find, Christ.

More often than not, however, I feel entitled to be treated fairly by others. Most of the time, I react indignently to unfair treatment. I wish I could more consistently have more of an external viewpoint and love others in all circumstances. I am working on this constantly, and God is giving me encouragment in His Word, teachings at church and even examples, like the one mentioned, where I am able to feel love through mistreatment.

God wants us to walk in others' shoes and feel empathy with others. The problem is that we, more often that not, are too absorbed in our own schedules, lives and families to look at a stranger and care about their circumstances.

Christ was a perfect example of looking beyond Himself and loving others. He took time in His fatigue and schedule to heal sick, talk to sinners and encourage the downtrodden. One of my favorite verses of compassion is Matthew 23:37. It states, “O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing." Christ realizes that these people will hurt Him, taunt Him, ridicule Him and kill Him, but He is able to have compassion over their sinful state and obstinate hearts. He doesn't excuse their behavior, but he loves them and wishes they could see the truth.

The next time a person mistreats you--a cashier is impatient with you or your children, a car cuts you off, or a co-worker gives you undeserved grief--walk in their shoes for a moment. Consider the possible circumstances of their lives and, most likely, their separation from God. Pray for compassion and think about why they might be acting in sin. This will prompt a heart filled with Christ's love to react to their unkindness with patience and caring.

Pleasing People

"'There is no other form of wickedness that can become more intense, nor its plans more vast, nor its obstinancy more enduring, nor its destruction more extensive, or more dreadful than the love of distinction."'--Timothy Dwight's sermon entitled, "On the Love of Distinction" (President of Yale College from the late 1700's to the early 1800's.) (pg. 17)




I am four chapters into a convicting and powerful read called Pleasing People, by Lou Priolo. As I stated in my earlier post, I hope to take each chapter and post some of the gems of Biblical truth and insight into sin that Priolo brings to light.

Chapter one is called "Characteristics of a People Pleaser." Priolo begins the chapter by stating the truths of I Corinthians 2:13. He warns against leaning on human wisdom and psychology to understand what man has labeled "co-dependency." Instead, I Corinthians tells us to diagnose our sin and lives, "not in words taught us by human wisdom but in words taught by the Spirit, expressing spiritual truths in spiritual words." Priolo goes on and defines "co-dependency" as idolotry--looking for other things to do what only God can do in my life. He says that people pleasing is a more specific diagnosis that falls under the category of idolotry. It it the idolotry of self and approval from others over the approval of God. (John 12:43)




He gives a quiz to see if the reader falls into the category of a people pleaser. Let me spare you the pain of the questions. You do. I do. We all do. Even if you do not consider yourself a people pleaser, Priolo points out how we are all tempted to care about others' approval more than God's--though some more often than others.




Priolo says there are two driving forces to people pleasing--the desire for approval of others or the fear of losing someone's approval or respect--the two sides of the same coin. He gives a few ways in which you know that you sin in desiring mans' approval more than God's.




1. He fears the displeasure of man more than the displeasure of God. Fear of man is the motivation here. You have thoughts such as, "I'm not prepared to meet this person," "What does he/she think of me?", I can't reveal too much of myself or he will know what I'm really like and reject me.", etc. A people pleaser who fears mans' disapproval "is often willing to forfeit the peace of God that comes from standing up and suffering for the truth." (25) He also makes this careful distinction. "A people-pleaser is not a peacemaker, but rather a peace-lover. A peacemaker is willing to endure the discomfort of a conflict in the hope of bringing about a peaceful resolution." (25) They choose lack of conflict over giving the Biblical action or truth.





2. He desires the praise of man above the praise of God. Priolo gives the example of the Pharisees as a biblical portrait of this characteristic. He says that this individual says in his first thought, "not 'How will God be glorified by what I am about to do?' but rather 'How will others perceive me when I do what I am about to do?'" Priolo gives the Biblical examples of being pleasing to and glorifying God in Phil. 4:8, Romans 12:1, and Luke 17:15.





3. He studies what it takes to please man as much as (if not more than) what it takes to please God. This person is considered sensitive. They might label themselves as "reading people well." Priolo states, "The people-pleaser is so intent on gaining approval that he spends much of his time studying the interests, aversions, words, inflections, and body language of people. He is often inordinately sensitive to the countenances of those he is trying to please." (27) With this characteristic is a hypocritical love. He serves/loves others with the wrong motives. He is not really trying to show love Biblically, but, rather, he is trying to improve his own reputation or standing by acting in the interest of others.





4. His speech is designed to entice and flatter others into thinking well of him. Priolo gives the truths of I Thessalonians 2:4-5, which tell us we have been approved by God to give the truths of the gospel in order to please God, not man. However, a people-pleaser:
-Rarely confronts sin in the life of another believer.
-Rarely challenges or even questions the opinions of others.
-Prematurely terminates conflicts (usually by yielding, with drawing or changing the subject)
-Rarely reveals to others the truth about who he really is inside (especially struggles with sin)
-Finds it difficult to say "no" to those who make requests of him, even when he knows that saying "yes" is will not be the best choice.
and the list goes on . . . (pg. 28-29)





5. He is a respecter of persons. This type of individual will put more value on certain people because of their position, authority, reputation, wealth, looks, etc. He is often more kind and caring toward these certain people in order to gain, what looks like to him, an advantage. This goes against the commands of Leviticus 19:15.





6. He is oversensitive to correction, reproof, and other allusions of dissatisfaction or disapproval on the part of others. Any negative comment appears to be a threat to his reputation and he returns Biblical admonishment with foolish contempt, hate, withdrawal, sulking, or pouting.





7. He outwardly renders eye service to man rather than inwardly rendering sincere ministry to the Lord. Doing service for others to see, rather than for glory and obedience to God will cause sin and imbalance. Burnout often will follow. Also, this person doesn't base success on whether God was pleased with the service or attempt, but on how he did in the eyes of man and his definition of success.





8. He selfishly uses the wisdom, abilities, and gifts that have been given to him for God's glory and the benefit of others for his own glory and personal benefit. Wishing for more and practicing a lack of contentment is a sign of using gifts for the approval of others. Priolo gives a long list: "personal wealth, physical beauty, spiritual gifts, wisdom, vocation, artistic ability, athletic ability, verbal ability, musical ability, education, intellectual ability, financial status, family heritage, position in community, position at work, Biblical knowledge, reputation, spiritual accomplishments, location of one's home, appearance of one's home, accomplishments of children, and wordly possessions" are just a few he mentions. In themselves, they can be pleasurable gifts from God. However, when we lust for more or use the gifts to merely serve self, we have sinned.





9. He invests more of his personal resources in establishing his own honor than he does in establishing God's honor. The time, effort, thought and money given to personal edification are more than those given to God or His church body (for the proper motives).





10. He is discontented with the condition and proportion that God has appointed for him. We question God's choice for us. The people pleaser always wants more honor, authority, influence and wealth. A people pleaser isn't thankful.


Okay, that is the end of chapter ONE! I know! I was so full of pain seeing how subtle quirks in my behavior were downright, ugly, prideful sin, that I didn't know if I wanted to read further. However, I did. I'll post more later. I told you this was a convicting and powerful read!

A Trip to Texas

We just returned from our whirlwind trip to San Antonio, Texas. I have piles of laundry calling to me from the other room, but I had to take a moment to post about the wonderful time we had. We arrived on Saturday and took advantage of the great time difference. We never got off our normal schedule, so Carter went to bed at 9:30 and slept in until 9:00 in the morning. It was great!

Our first night there, we went to the River Walk, which was steps from our hotel. It was so beautiful. Green canopies of trees and vines shrouded a lazy, winding path along a canal, which was puncuated with stone and wrought iron bridges. Along the shore were glowing lanterns and candles blinking from the patios of the various restaurants and hotels. Colorful boats, decorated in Texan red, white and blue, would carry visitors down the river on tours. Though it was extremely crowded and busy, it was paradoxically peaceful and lovely. We spent three of our nights at restaurants along the river, including one night watching the "Fiesta week boat parade" that just happened to fall during the week we were visiting.

The first full day we were in Texas, we drove to the outskirts of San Antonio and enjoyed a day at Sea World. I found it eerily enjoyable that an amusement park didn't have hour lines and crowds at every turn. The weather was actually nice--a little humid and warm, but some clouds kept the intense heat at bay. The day was wonderful, though it was nothing like the Sea World in San Diego. This Sea World had roller coasters, a water slide park and fewer animal exhibits. Carter enjoyed the playground area and the water park fun (picture the Ladera water park in Sea World). Ryan and I took turns on the roller coasters during Carter's nap in his stroller. Of course, we also enjoyed seeing dolphins, "Shamu", penguins, crocodiles, seals, sea lions, fish and sharks.

The second day we toured San Antonio. We visited the Mexican themed Market Square (much like the artisans mercado in Rosarito), the governor's Spanish house, the Tower of Americas (identical to the Space Needle in Seattle), a crazy wooden fort playground, the Alamo (we saw Isaac Millsaps name, Robby and Rebecca), the famous cathedral and many plazas with music and fountains.

The third full day we went to the San Antonio Children's Museum in the morning. Carter liked all the pretend play. Driving a bulldozer was probably Carter's favorite activity, though they had a star and cloud room that he liked immensely, pretending it was naptime and lying down to watch the stars. (Mommy and daddy appreciated this break too). In the afternoon, we drove to the Texas capital, Austin. We swam in the city's main park swimming hole, rode on the park miniature train, ate snow cones on a playground with Carter, saw the Capital Building, drove through the University of Texas, ate at an authentic Texas bbq place and ate the richest, yummiest ice cream at Amy's--a famous ice cream store found only in Austin.

It was such a fun trip. This might, God willing, be the last big trip with just the three of us. That made me wistful as we got on our plane to return home. We have so many fun trip memories with Carter. He is such a big ball of energy and fun. Though I got a "Ya'll have your hands full, don't cha?" in the elevator (as Carter was trying to scale the elevator wall), I wouldn't trade our adventures for anything. Thank you for all your prayers on behalf of the weather and our safety. Texas was terrific!